Inspired!

I couldn't wait to sit down to write this post.  After my brother successfully finished the NYC Marathon on Sunday, I was pumped up, excited, filled up.  Simply put, he inspired me - by his actions, by the commitment and the courage.

It made my wonder, what is this thing we call, inspiration?

I looked it up and from a definition perspective I found comments like:  to heighten, to intensify, to stimulate, to encourage.  I do certainly feel these things, even today three days later. 

AND, I feel something else.  It's been hard to put my finger on it, so it took a while for this blog post to be created.  I wondered over the last three days if inspiration comes in compartments, like being inspired on the job versus in your personal life.  It occurred to me that I have had tremendous energy for all parts of my life these last few days, so the answer seems to be, no.  I can be inspired in my personal life and it carries over to all of my undertakings.

So how does something that I did NOT do, come to have such a significant impact on my personal life, my professional life, even in my alone moments?

Then it hit me.  When the undertaking, or "enterprise," is one of scope, risk, and complication and we can witness the undertaking first hand, cheer from the sidelines, hold the belief and trust that all will be well, we are forever changed by what is possible. 

My brother is 38 years old, has three kids, is an amateur runner at best and a year ago Thanksgiving he said he intended to run this race.  At the Holidays, with six siblings, all with kids running around, lots of chaos and fun, someone who says they're gonna run 26 miles seemed more funny than plausible.  And so I did not take much note of this declaration.

But as I cheered him on Sunday, I wondered about the deep sacrifice he made to train for this undertaking.  My teacher says, 'sacrifice' really means 'to make sacred again.'  To get up every week, knowing you had one less week to train, or that this week it was three short 8 mile runs, or next week it will be a long 13 mile run, and on and on. I now understand my teacher's comment.  This had to come from the heart; it can not be your mind that finishes this undertaking. 

Maybe that's a piece of what is inspiring: It is not a focus on what we give up but a focus on what we give.

Three hours after the race, my brother sent an email to so many of the people who supported him during the race.  I was touched by the humility and grace with which he thanked everyone.  He called out the moments when he saw them, at 96th Street, 110th, First Avenue, thanking them all, and saying how much their support made a difference.

Perhaps that's what leadership really looks like - to set an intention, to give of yourself, and to be so grateful for the support and belief of others.

PS, I also discovered that the word inspire means 'to inhale deeply.'  When was the last time you inhaled deeply?

Mine was Sunday afternoon!

And it still feels amazing.  Thanks, Neal. 

To Stand Alone and Risk Looking Ridiculous

When I had some medical challenges earlier this year and had to have surgery, I wasn't worried, not at first.  I'd put away money for just such a thing.   Like a good soldier, I had my surgery, recovered, and went back to work.

It was while I was building my clientele back that I understood for the first time that I had crossed some invisible line.  I realized that:

• I do coach my clients, but I can not define myself as simply a coach, not anymore
• I do consult with my clients but I would never want to be classified with the likes of the McKinsey's
• What I do and how I do it is very different than anything that has been tried in the past, and
• I've gone to the very edge of my comfort, that place on the ancient maps that says, "Beyond here th'er be dragons!"

In the midst of this discomforting insight, a family member asked me, "Why?  Why do you keep going? You don't have anything to prove. It wouldn't be a failure.  Just let it go.  Come back to the East Coast.  Get a job here, any job."

In an instant, every moment I have ever failed flashed through my head and with brilliant searing clarity, I realized that failure wasn't even possible. 

The secret is out.  MacGregor, Schein, Csikszentmihalyi, they started it.  And these leaders, all have lead the way: Tony Hsieh, John Mackey, Tim Ferriss, George Zimmer, Roxanne Emmerich, Tony Schwartz, Stephen M. Covey, Christine Comaford-Lynch, Keith Ferrazzi, Bill George, Hazel Henderson, Sarano Kelley, Tim Sanders, Casey Sheahan , Vicki Robin, Shai Agassi, Ping Fu, Lance Secretan, Tami Simon, Randy Komisar, Chip Conley, Juanita Brown, Richard Barrett, Lisa Nirell, Srikumar Rao, Bo Burlingham, Bettie Spruill, Paul Spiegelman, Marcia Wieder, Alan Gregerman, Kellie McElhaney, Chester Elton, Monika Broecker, Ari Weinzweig, Ahmed Rahim, Jeff Hayzlett, Simon Sinek, Raj Sisodia.

And me! I have added my piece - Transforming the human side of enterprise is one of the four components of creating sustainability.  People, planet, profit and purpose, the quadruple bottom line, all connected. 

Failure isn't possible simply because I am in too much good company. But something else nagged at me.  Why don't I just quit?  And the answer came:

.... because I'm still afraid.

In 1999, I raised my hand timidly at Columbia Business School and asked my professors, "In what class will we learn how to get along with each other and work together?"

Complete silence.  Then one of the academic supervisors said, "HR is next semester."  Everyone laughed. Except me. I didn't get it.  Where were the 'people' people? But, I tucked my head and went back to coloring inside the lines.

It's been twelve years since that day.  And I've picked at this scab every day, chipping away at the idea that how people work in a business is just as important if not more important than how the business itself works. 

I've heard it said that 'to stand alone and risk looking ridiculous' is the measure of a true leader. Until last Thursday I was uncertain of my leadership status.  

At the Boeing Auditorium at the University of Washington, I stood alone and said, "Ten years from now, not a single company or enterprise will exist without a Chief Culture Officer, a Director of Culture, or even simply named, the 'people' people."

I suppose I can quit now. 

Nah.

My Hands Are Full

This is an old story told by the Cherokee, the long version is much better, but we don't have much time so this will have to do. 

A Grandfather and grandson were walking in the forest.  The Elder began pointing out bits and pieces of nature, small glimpses of the wonders of the forest.  He asked his grandson to carry 'a few' things for him and without hesitation the grandson agreed.  They walked for hours.  The Elder saw much he prized and picked up one item after another, asking permission, giving thanks, and handing it over to be carried.  Soon, his grandson was stuffing his pockets, his back pack, and juggling as  many of these prize articles as he could. The Elder finally exclaimed joy over finding a special but large rock and bent to examine it.  Once again asking permission and giving thanks, he bid his grandson to carry it too.

"But Grandfather my hands are full."

The Elder smiled and looked deeply at his grandson and said, "I guess you'll just have to drop something."

This is the way of letting go.  We gather so much to ourselves, we think we have to or need to have more.  We think we will let someone else down because we can not carry any more.  Or, and this one is the worst, we think we will miss out on something, so we hold on to more and more.

Letting go is patience and wisdom and courage.  Simple and complex.

Letting go is not something you practice, you do it.  Or you don't.

The Hero Within

What's that old Mae West line, "Fasten your seat belts, boys, it's gonna be a bumpy ride!"

Many of you know already where I am going with this.  The last few months, and the last few weeks in particular, have been rough.  Whether it's miscommunications with the people we love, job stressors spinning us out of control, confusing thoughts about where we're going and what we should be doing, we're in the "soup." (Kinda feels like the second Lord of The Rings movie!)

Every member of my coaching practice is feeling the changing energy right now.  The Gulf of Mexico has dredged up the bottom silt and we're in the murk.  Our stock market is on a rollercoaster ride, and btw, that will only intensify over the next weeks.  This seems to be a time of blame and judgement.  It seems that our baser instincts are coming to the surface, and we are reacting to our situations, not responding to them.

Snap judgments, bursts of anger seemingly from out of nowhere, 15 year friendships that just end, these are a few examples of what my clients are experiencing. Then there are the physical ailments.  My healthy-as-a-horse clients are suddenly finding they aren't feeling well, back is thrown out, flue-like conditions that are msyterious, etc. Some have just experienced all of the craziness mentioned above, and then found out that they're pregnant!!!   Whoa, Nellie!

These choppy waters are producing conditions that, while difficult to live through, are chock filled with opportunity.  More on that in the next blog post.  First steps are: how do we handle the current, the white water; how do we go with the flow and not cling to the shores?  

1.  Acknowledge what you're feeling, and look at how it may be driving your behavior.  Tell people you love them, if that is the truth, and find the lessons learned in each situation. 

2.  Whatever your spiritual beliefs, whether it is a belief in energy and physics, or a belief in spirit and mystery without benefit of science, or simply the beauty of nature, reconnect.  Make sacred your everyday life.  This is very calming, and grounding.

3.  Find a way to honor the process, appreciating yourself for having the courage to keep moving forward.

4.  One of my teachers says, "Put your head on your shoulder."  This is her way of saying 'stay out of your head, let your heart do more of the talking.'

5.  Don't be tempted to settle.  Hold the vision of where you want to go, see it happening.

6.  Don't resist the craziness, accept it, and let it do its job.  By October many of us will be in completely different circumstances and we will love what our life looks like and where it's going.

Bottom line, don't fix it, it's fixing you, breaking down the old, making way for the new. 

Seat belts?  Who needs seat belts!

A Revolutionary Act

I sat down to write another blog post, and it was like pulling teeth.  I started out with the intention to write about truth-telling and relate it to the workplace, asking the question where do we bravely tell the truth?

Nothing happened.  That creative spark I always feel deserted me.  Gone, poof.  Nada.

I thought at first that I was just pushing the topic into overload, and decided to look for inspiration elsewhere.  Pulled out some of my favorite books, hoping that something would light that fire and the process to create would begin. 

Still nothing. 

Slowly the words crept into my consciousness.  Where aren’t you telling the truth, Kelleen?

Now we were someplace else.  The vague shadow of my life was pushing through the veils of separation and wanted out – out out.

This is Seattle, so being ‘out’ is nearly deifying. I thought how hard could it be, to say the truth, my truth. 

So I typed the next words – I actually typed the truth, the stripped it down, going for broke, truth.

In a total copycat maneuver, channeling Kevin Costner in Bull Durham ala “I believe in long slow deep wet kisses that last for three days…” thang, I typed.  And typed.  My fingers flew, breaking land speed barriers….

Uh-Oh.  (Sh**.) 

You can’t see this but what was on this page, before I deleted it, was my truth. When I read what I wrote, I actually looked over my shoulder in an unconscious move to see if “IT” had gotten out.

What the hell is so scary about any of that stuff anyway; I’ll never know.  But I got the point.  When you’re a coach, and you do my kind of work, it isn’t about knowing all the answers, and typing them up in a nice neat blog post.   

It isn’t about asking the right questions either, which I’m sure surprises some of you. What is a question but an attempt to limit a conversation and take it in a prescribed direction? Right?

The point, is only that we all have truth-telling to do.  And if we’re really lucky we have someone in our life that will be called to witness our truth - a brother, girlfriend, lover, or a coach. We want to know that those mini acts of bravery or those massively courageous moments, are actually seen by someone, someone who knows, someone who appreciates our effort, small or large, to cast off the illusion and step into light. 

And that is the fuel of truth.

George Orwell said, “During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.”

Viva la Revolucion!!!!

(This blog post is dedicated to Kath N. and those of you who have told the truth, stepping into what is true for you, I admire you and respect you.)